Living in the present.

Day 240 of 365

With all of the shit going on in our lives right now it’s so easy to stress about the future, dwell on the past and forget the present.
There is only one time that matters.
Right now
I tend to believe that if you give your all to each moment and opportunity as it arrises you will lead a good life.
That’s really all I’m after, a good life well lived and a family to share it with.
Each day I realize how short life is and it only seems to be a ball rolling down an increasingly steeper hill.
Don’t forget to be in this moment, to love with your whole heart and let those around you know how much they mean to you.
I often forget to do this, and other times I look like a complete sap because I am not afraid to say I love you to my closest friends and family.
If today was all that I had, I want them to know.

Embracing variation.

Day 239 of 365

In Utah today in a town that is largely a military community visiting one of my best friends in the world.

Growing up ridiculously American I ate at subways, Mcdonalds, Dunkin Donuts etc.
The beauty of these places is that there is absolutely no variation in the product no matter where you go.
It’s cheap identical and pretty low quality but it’s always the same and Americans love that.
As I got older I started to realize the quality of smaller restaurants, coffee shops, etc. and although the product may vary the health and taste of the product was almost always better.

In different places around this country they make the same foods differently and holy shit has it been such a pleasant surprise so many times.
For example in Colorado I once had the best sausage egg and cheese between two waffles I’ve ever had, or in Australia they put vanilla ice cream in my ice coffee.
Variation and new perspectives is such a beautiful thing in life.
Next time your in a new city avoid the Dunkin Donuts try the local coffee shops, talk to the local shop owners get the inside scoop on where to go and try something new.

The shop owner I met today recommended Antelope canyon since we are so close to it.
Having done no research before this trip any tips on where to go will all be coming from the locals that live here.
Stoked to see this place later today.

Antelope Island State Park-48-L.jpg

It's not raining.

Day 238 of 365

It’s too nice out today so I edited these as quickly as I could in a coffee shop.
This is me not skipping a day due to good weather.

Love you guys hope everyone has a good day.

How to drown.

Day 237 of 365

For as long as I could remember I’ve had an affinity for the ocean. From the time my brothers and I were babies my mother took us to the beaches in Rhode Island every summer. We’d spend our days in the water and end our nights with bon fires on the beach wrapped in sweatshirts eating reeses s’mores and telling ghost stories. My memories of the ocean are visceral, the smells and the feeling of salt on my skin are stained in my mind but days like yesterday really put into perspective how such a beautiful thing can so quickly turn into a beast.

I’ll start by saying this, I am not that strong of a swimmer. I never was on a swim team and I did not grow up on the ocean. I was and still am merely a summer tourist of the sea hence my naivety and lack of judgement when it comes to tides, swells, and the wind. Yesterday I paddled for 45 minutes trying to go with the tide to get out to the break. With no luck I was consistently battered by waves until I had to give up.
A short time later with ocean water still in my lungs I tried to get out again. This time it was a success. After some time waiting for a smaller waves I was slammed again completely out of gas and cramped under water. I tried a couple more times after this but even the most experienced surfers out there were hardly catching anything.

This experience was extremely humbling. The ocean and nature all together is not something to mess with and yesterday I had what I would call beginner syndrome.
When your so naive about difficult something is so you over estimate your abilities and end up biting off more than you can chew.

I’m still chewing.

Why we hate.

Day 236 of 365

Bastards don’t lose sleep over their stubborn ways.
Dripping wax into your eyes doesn’t burn them.
There is no feeling in a stubborn bull. 
No heart in a gun. 
You can’t ask for an apology from a bullet.
Best move on or the mourning will find you.

I’ve always wondered why we hate things foreign to us. I think it’s a deep routed primitive feeling that serves little purpose today. I hate certain people, things, beliefs, It helps me avoid being dragged down into things I know are no good for me. I don’t think I should hate them though and here’s why.

Hate has always been a source of anger for me.
As a kid I hated the world because it took my father from me.
I was extremely violent.
I felt like the only way to avoid the same fate and to not let the bad guy win was to beat the shit out of anyone that picked on me or my friends.
Well I learned quickly there is no bad guy.
There’s just people.
We’re all capable of really good things and really bad things.
Ex. Nazi Germany. There is no way ever German during WW2 was a bad person.

I guess the goal here for me is to become conscious of my hate and to instead extend love and empathy towards those things I do not like instead of aggression and animosity.

Having empathy towards your opposition isn’t a badge of approval but rather it’s a chance to learn in a positive way and besides hate takes a lot more energy than not giving a f*ck.

Hope you all enjoy your day.

Ego is the enemy.

Day 235 of 365

So much of what I Identify with is bullshit. I don’t know how it is for you but my pride has stopped me from doing more things than I’d like to admit.
There is an ego I identify with an the imposter I sometimes feel that I am.
I pick and chose.
I am too good for this not good enough for that.
It’s all a big fat load of bullshit.
Do whatever the fuck you want and don’t apologize for it.
Everyday is a chance for me to work my ass off towards my goals, meet new people, see new things, and have fun doing it.
That’s exactly what I intend on continuing.
It’s your life to lead not your parents or anyone else’s.

Below are photos I am featuring because they were shot by my best friend Dylan on a trip to Belize.
I bought a point and shoot camera before the trip because I knew he would come up with some whacky photos.
Dylan is the most creative person I have ever met because he has the ability to finish projects with lightning speed.
These photos are important to this blog because Dylans creations have everything to do with ignoring the ego.
He is not a photographer but he didn’t let that stop him he was a person having fun with a camer and he came back with some amazing pictures.
I think whatever you do it’s important to have fun while doing it and the work will benefit from it.
Here are his photos from that trip.

Monday morning.

Day 234 of 365

It's easy to feel on paper. 
There's less judgement.
I can say things that out loud would alarm most ear drums. 
It's good practice to feel for once. 
What I couldn't in front of her. 

Why Waterbury is the best place to live in Connecticut.

Day 233 of 365

Sorry, I bated you with that title, Waterbury is a pretty terrible place to live. 

To get to the point it's gross how much people bitch about where they live how little there is to do yet I never see anyone doing anything. 
I run about 4-5 days a week rain or shine.
If it rains I am always and I mean always the only one outside. 
Even if it rains I'm out taking photos, in the cold, in the snow, etc. I have literally never run into anyone in inclement weather. 

It is so foreign to see people walking outside here other than in the summer that most of the time in the fall I get the cops called on me for photographing in suburban neighborhoods.  
I have scoured so much of this town and Waterbury for things to photograph and I don't think it is possible to photograph everything these towns have to offer in one lifetime. 
So forgive me if I sound a bit crass but I think it's bullshit when people say there is nothing new to do here. 
You can always reframe your surroundings. 
There is opportunity everywhere. 
You just have to seek it out and make shit happen for yourself. 

Staying poor is a mindset.

Day 232 of 365

Scarcity is more of a mindset than a reality.  People are poor yes. 
Some people are extremely poor but I believe what keeps them there has more to do with a mindset than our realities. 

I never believed that there weren't any photography jobs out there. 
Otherwise I wouldn't have gotten into photography but at times I've felt myself slip into a mindset of scarcity. 
When I was younger I worried what if someone doesn't hire me this month I will miss my bills etc. 
Once I realized there is an infinite amount of money in the world this fear has been so put on the back burner and business has been better than ever. 

There are enough jobs in this world for everyone. 
Maybe these jobs don't exist yet but then you can go make one. 
There is no excuse not to find work. 

I work about 2 days a month right now and I pay all my bills. 
Yes I write, edit, take pictures, and contact potential clients pretty much everyday but this is hardly work. 
Most of it is fun and the days I have shoots with clients are almost always extremely fun. 

I do not believe in competition, I do not believe in scarcity I only believe in quality and abundance. 

If you provide something of quality and exceed peoples expectations consistently you will live in abundance. 

Everything you want is out there. 
Go get what you want. 



Keep good friends.

Day 231 of 365

You are 1 part the company you keep and 1 part you.  It's a dance.  If you want to do more of something that your friends aren't into or aren't doing you need to find the people that are doing it.  Otherwise you will be stuck doing things you don't want to do and you will be something you do not like. 

Ex. If you hang with friends that never create anything on the weekends, or do anything other than drink you are going to find yourself never progressing in your free time. 

Although weekends like this are a blast, everything in moderation because what is daily will define.

Surround yourself with people that inspire you to do more and do better. 

Photographing the Catskills

Day 230 of 365

Spent the past few days in Hudson, NY photographing for Hudson Made, a company I have been a fan of for some time now.  Experiences like this remind me why I love photography so much. 
The privilege to try new things, like sheep cheese, good wine, fresh vegetables, and to do it all with amazingly talented people is a dream come true.  I never knew where a camera could take me but I don't fear that it will lead me down a dead end anymore. 
It has only ever opened doors not close them. 
So to whoever is out there contemplating going back to a safe stable career despite how much you can't stand it....fuck that. You can work part time somewhere to pay your bills.  
Life is really short marathon. 
It goes by way too fast but we need to commit to the race to make sure we accomplish our goals.
Make a long term decision to commit to what makes you happy. 

I did. 

Despite the tons of people telling me, that's a saturated market, everyones a photographer, my friend went to school for that now she's back getting her second degree, etc. etc. etc. 

I've never been happier with my decision to stick this out instead of going back to school or getting a "normal" job. 

If you want something bad enough you'll find a way to make it happen. 

How to be anything you want. Within reason.

Day 229 of 365

What's daily will define. 

If you want to be something do it daily you will inevitably become it. 
I have no fear that I will not be a photographer, fuck I already am but it took years of daily practice to get here I didn't buy a camera and poof. 
Whatever you spend your days doing you will become. 
Most people I know spend there days doing jobs they're just okay at or that they don't enjoy. 
There is no self awareness in that. 
What do you love and what are good at? 
For me that's the intersection I'd like to be at for my work.
A more than tolerable career and more than enough income.

Live before you die.

Day 228 of 365

Everyone always tells you life is short.  Yet for some reason, it still feels infinite.  We still smoke, drink, eat till were stuffed and ignore our bodies like they will last forever.  I mean I get it when you wake up it's all you have, it's always there. 
You are apart of this world and I find it essential not to just exist in it. 
I know for most people existing is great. 
Wake up go to work, live a noble humble life and provide for your family. 
I want to live a life I am happy to leave as a mark on this earth. 
When my time comes I don't want to be begging for more time. 
I want to have left it all on the table. 

This is why I am segregating myself from naysayers. 
These are the people you tell your plans to and their first response is how will you be able to afford that? that's going to be really hard... 
Well, no shit, if it was easy everyone would have it, or be doing it. 
No one ever left a legacy as a subpar accountant. 
It's what you do that's difficult, extra, or above expectations that makes you extraordinary. 
If you avoid everything that is difficult how do you expect to have a happy and fulfilling life? 
I know for me having strong relationships, creating tangible high-quality work, learning, and giving back makes me happiest.
It may be different for you but the end of progression is the most terrifying failure to me.

Today's blog is a bit of a jumbled rant but that's okay. 
I've been back in Connecticut for 2 days now and after talking to some of the people that live here there is a starch difference between the people I meet in NY vs the people I talk to in CT. 
The Connecticut people often hate their jobs, or they complain about them and then say they're okay jobs to have.  
The NY people I hang out with often talk about their jobs as a stepping stone, a start to a progression, or they just love their work. 
There is a mix in both states but the overwhelming majority of people in Connecticut settle so fast. 
With that mindset life has not just begun, it is just the start of the end. 


Learning from journaling.

Day 227 of 365

Thinking about this blog this morning and the new things I want to do with it and I realized I often neglect what I don't know.  (Which is a whole LOT. )  Due to my language it seems I am speaking in an absolute tone.  I hope anyone that reads this takes my words with a grain of salt and knows that it is an exploration of my thoughts and the things I read. 

I am trying to learn, understand things I am struggling with and share.  It's a big fat learning process.  Like being in the middle of the ocean by yourself.  I'm just on here exploring my thoughts and it should be taken as such. 
I have a lot of fun writing, it allows me to purge whatever is plaguing my mind.

With that being said I hope it provokes you guys to think, and I hope it's enjoyable.  Looking forward to switching things up and interviewing some other creatives for some up and coming blog posts. 

Hope everyone has an amazing day. 

Much love, 

Surf Photography NYC

Day 228 of 365

Sitting on the beach yesterday getting bit by horse flies I had a moment of clarity. 
Everything around me zoned out as I observed my brain breathing for a second. 
I thought back to a book I read The Compound Effect it's about a very basic principle.  Making good choices compound into better choices and more success and making bad choices compounds into more bad choices.  
It's so simple but it's funny how I can so easily ignore this as I feel most people do. 
Simple things like not exercising for a day, not eating a vegetable, having an extra piece of cake. 
These are just the start of things that have a longer effect on our lives. 

I have a friend that loves to do 30-day challenges.  Not really my thing but I think they are great. 
I have some other friends that love to bash these they think it's a weak-willed excuse for taking control of your life. 
What I see from my friends that disagree with these 30-day challenges is that they drink every weekend with no end in sight, they're okay with the extra piece of cake etc.  They still have a great physique but none of us have seen the effects of drinking, or shitty eating on our bodies when they are done for 20 years consistently. 

This baffles me. 
It also scares the shit out of me.  Imagine a cigarette a day for 20 years.  It's like taking a block of concrete and taking a chip out of it every day for 20 years.  In the end, you are going to be left with nothing instead if you added a block of concrete to it every day for 20 years you'd be left with a house. 

This is the essence of compounding for me. 
This book kicked my ass into gear. 
I now exercise regularly and have been seriously changing my eating habits. 
Although I may not be fit now or where I want to be. 
I know that if I keep it up, if I send that extra email every day, if I take pictures for an extra 30 minutes, if I have one less beer that in a year, 2, 3 from now things will be exactly where I want them to be. 
I won't have to join a weight watchers club, won't have to worry about being laid off, I will have avoided a ton of issues that come from the seemingly meaningless piece of cake. 

Yes, you have to find a balance and be able to be able to enjoy the fruits of life but everything in life is 80-20 not the other way around. 

Freelance your way to money.

Day 226 of 365

I was running this morning and all I could think was “Pain is the window in which happiness is obtained.”
You have so many options in life and everything you want lies on the other side of pain, consistency, and a mindset of abundance. Those are some of the simplest principles to grasp but the hardest to commit to. Wealth, Love, Happiness. 

Things we all want, and they are all available in abundance through pain and generosity. Work hard, bring value to people, and expect nothing in return. 

I’ll give you guys an example of this. My old boss and my first mentor really lead with his actions. He was extremely hard working and has no aversion to pain or risk. He now owns multiple businesses and is doing quite well for himself. Through pain and consistency, he has found freedom and economic abundance. (Wealth)He comes from a place of abundance which is shown through his generosity. 
When I was at my lowest point financially he paid for my flight to Italy for a job interview with no intention of getting the money back because he saw how hard I was working.You better fucking believe I’ll give the same generosity to an intern or hard-working employee of mine one day. And because of his generosity, I will never say no to him.If he needed me tomorrow I would be there. 
(Love, and Loyalty) 

Through his pain, struggle, generosity, and relationships my old boss has achieved a lot. He has a strong network, family, and business. 
I’m pretty sure he’s happy with where he is in life. 

In conclusions here is what I learned from him. 

Love, Wealth, and Relationships are not like a pie. Every time you give them out there isn’t less for yourself. Rather all of these things are like a muscle. The more you give love, invest money, and connect people to meaningful relationships the stronger those muscles become. 
Through generosity and pain, you are opening yourself up to long-term wealth, love, and happiness. 

How to instantly change your mood.

Day 225 of 365

Yesterday I was feeling a little grumpy and I let it affect my behavior and my mood.  That's unacceptable.  It's okay to feel but it is not okay to act poorly from it.  That it what children do.
So to end my night I did what I do every night.  I make a todo list for the next day.  I include details down to what I will eat and I chunk things into 30 minute to 1 hour time blocks and how I will devote myself to each hour.

It works wonders for my productivity but nothing...and I mean nothing does more for my productivity and mood than starting my day off with a run. 
I have been running for about a month now and I haven't ran in the morning yet. 
I ran for 2 months straight back in November and December of 2017. 
5:30 am every morning with out music. 

This morning I finally repeated that routine and holy shit did it open my eyes again. 
My pace was better than ever. 
I focused on my breathing and I felt my brain take a back seat as it observed it's own thoughts. 
Soon enough I was at the end of my 4.5 mile run on top of a hill I have not been able to run up yet and I realized holy shit I just ran up that hill. 
While I was doing it I was so lost in my thoughts I had almost forgotten about my body entirely. 
It was on auto pilot. 

The body does what the brain tells it. 
Don't let external factors and moods control your behavior. 
Decide what you want to feel and do and make it happen. 

Most importantly whenever your down, depressed upset, feel lazy, just get up and exercise. 
It will help you focus, clear your brain and ultimately make you more happy and in control of your life. 

P.s. Try running or exercising in silence without music. 
Or even with Binaural beats playing in your ear. 
Anything that will drown out your consciousness. 
Music makes you conscious of lyrics, and being conscious while your running makes you conscious of the pain you are in. 
Anything to make running more pleasing makes it easier to continue and make a part of your life. 

Good luck. 

Photos from below are taken on an old 2005 point and shoot camera in York beach, Maine. 
It's a place that is very special to me. 
It was my fathers favorite place in the world and he is one of my biggest inspirations for running. 
It was something he loved to do. 


Photographing the Details of Maine.

Day 224 of 365

I'm sorry I haven't posted in a few days.  I decided to take a little break from shooting, editing, writing and just try to enjoy myself for a few days.  What a stupid idea. A massive derailment from all the processes I love and cherish so dearly.  I didn't need a vacation.  Although it was fun as hell I didn't produce or create anything new or original.  My camera was down more than it was up but I realized a few things.  

It's hard for me to travel with other people that aren't photographers or models.
When people travel most people see it as vacation unless you are traveling for work, which is always the case for me.  
So traveling with people that want to vacation is very distracting.

The second thing I learned. 
I am most productive when I start my day alone and with a routine. 
It's like a jump start to my day for optimizing my time. 
It's essential for me otherwise I can hardly focus. 

The third thing. 
Pack healthy food. 
Fuck I hate eating shit late night, or struggling to find fruit for breakfast because often small towns have a limited selection. 
It's your responsibility to put food in your own mouth, no one else's. 
So if you go to a country or a town where the selection is limited don't be mad at the town's people or the store owners. 
Be mad at yourself for not taking responsibility for your own eating habits. 


Notice the beautiful details which make a place or a time unique. 

Us in 2018.



Coffee Table books and Running

Day 223 of 365

I chose quiet pictures today because over the past 2 days I have been working on making a mini poetry book.  Something for a coffee table.  I write every morning not just on here but in a journal.  This is something I started back in November and I am on my 6th journal now.  There is something so deeply satisfying about filling up pages until there is no more space to write.  You can't really accomplish that on the internet or anything digital.  It's a much slower process, more methodical, it's much harder for my hands to keep up with my brain when I have a pen in my hands.  I enjoy it. 

With this being said I'm really curious to know how many of you actually like poetry accompanied with corresponding photos for each poem.  If you'd be interested in purchasing one of these comment yes or no anonymously  below and if you want to say why  that'd be an even bigger help.  

I am also working on some photography editing tutorials if that is something your interested in, don't worry those are coming soon.  

Back to why I chose quiet pictures today. 
The same day I made the conscious decision to write everyday I also chose to run everyday but I fell out of it. 
Through work, travel, moving back to New York, I let it fall by the wayside.  
I was able to run everyday for 2 months then I broke from my decision. 
It was a terrible feeling. 
This time I was able to identify why i stopped running...Because it's fucking hard lol
It's easy and more comfortable to write everyday and it's painful and way more rewarding to run everyday. 
3 weeks ago I started running again.  4.5 miles every other day and if I feel up for it I run 2 days in a row and I skate board on the in between days.
I am committed to activity now.  I want to keep my body in motion until I die for health reasons. 
Yesterday was my best day yet I chose a new route 6 miles my furthest yet but when I got home I still had so much energy. 
So I decided to run my normal 4.5 mile route on top of what I had already did.
Holy shit did my legs get sore fast. 
All I could do was quiet my mind. 
My body just kept moving and I was out there having a good time. 
All I had to do was keep moving forward. 
Around mile 9 I ended up stopping at a liquor store an getting the coldest and best tasting corona of my life. 
I chugged it and continued on my route home. (luckily I didn't cramp) 
It was a great day for me and seeking pain only showed me one thing. 
Your mind is in charge not your body. 
That thing could be falling apart and if your mind says move it does. 

Seek pain. Quiet your mind.