Coffee Table books and Running

Day 223 of 365

I chose quiet pictures today because over the past 2 days I have been working on making a mini poetry book.  Something for a coffee table.  I write every morning not just on here but in a journal.  This is something I started back in November and I am on my 6th journal now.  There is something so deeply satisfying about filling up pages until there is no more space to write.  You can't really accomplish that on the internet or anything digital.  It's a much slower process, more methodical, it's much harder for my hands to keep up with my brain when I have a pen in my hands.  I enjoy it. 

With this being said I'm really curious to know how many of you actually like poetry accompanied with corresponding photos for each poem.  If you'd be interested in purchasing one of these comment yes or no anonymously  below and if you want to say why  that'd be an even bigger help.  

I am also working on some photography editing tutorials if that is something your interested in, don't worry those are coming soon.  

Back to why I chose quiet pictures today. 
The same day I made the conscious decision to write everyday I also chose to run everyday but I fell out of it. 
Through work, travel, moving back to New York, I let it fall by the wayside.  
I was able to run everyday for 2 months then I broke from my decision. 
It was a terrible feeling. 
This time I was able to identify why i stopped running...Because it's fucking hard lol
It's easy and more comfortable to write everyday and it's painful and way more rewarding to run everyday. 
3 weeks ago I started running again.  4.5 miles every other day and if I feel up for it I run 2 days in a row and I skate board on the in between days.
I am committed to activity now.  I want to keep my body in motion until I die for health reasons. 
Yesterday was my best day yet I chose a new route 6 miles my furthest yet but when I got home I still had so much energy. 
So I decided to run my normal 4.5 mile route on top of what I had already did.
Holy shit did my legs get sore fast. 
All I could do was quiet my mind. 
My body just kept moving and I was out there having a good time. 
All I had to do was keep moving forward. 
Around mile 9 I ended up stopping at a liquor store an getting the coldest and best tasting corona of my life. 
I chugged it and continued on my route home. (luckily I didn't cramp) 
It was a great day for me and seeking pain only showed me one thing. 
Your mind is in charge not your body. 
That thing could be falling apart and if your mind says move it does. 

Seek pain. Quiet your mind. 

Creative Jobs.

Day 222 of 365

Everyday is just an excuse to work on something new. 
There are hardly any excuses besides family that are valid reasons not to create today. 
Most of us think we are born with or without creativity. 
Thats bullshit. 
Creativity to me is a derived from continuous creation.  
The deeper you get into the creations in whatever genre you are pursuing the more like you you
You don't need to be an expert to be creative you just need to look at things differently. 

Yesterday we sat in Kevins camper for the last time. 
It was a blast. 
We drank some beers and collectively brainstormed on ideas and tasks we are working on. 
It was a productive and fun way to spend our Sunday v.s. the alternative going to a restaurant eating drinking and getting nothing accomplished. 

Work before play doesn't mean that your work cannot be fun. 

Film photography at Rockaway Beach

Day 221 of 365

Pay attention. 
It's something I've always struggled with. 
To be here. 
In this moment and be aware. 
To not think of yesterday, or tomorrow, finances, or fear of missing out. 
When I am present in the moment in the activity life seems to be pure. 
Like your a kid again. 

There are some things in my life I would highly recommend that seem to put me into that space. 
The ocean. 
Writing. (sometimes) 
Playing guitar. 
Taking photos when the sunrises. (That specific time because I seem to be in a groggy dreamlike state still. 

What do you get lost in?
What makes time melt away? 
You don't need to make money off of this thing but you should give yourself deadlines to do it more often.

There is no place like the present and whatever gets you there should be somewhat of a priority.

Photos featured below are from last Sunday with friends at Rockaway Beach, Nyc. 
One of my favorite places where I can sit i the water for hours and forget everything in life. 
I hope you enjoy. 

What makes a place home.

Day 220 of 365

When was the last time you walked around your neighborhood?  It's one of my favorite things to do.  I don't talk about this enough on here but at some point I realized that I really like walking more than I like photography.  My camera is just the vessel that encourages me to walk more often.  Most mornings and every time I visit a new place you can usually find me walking around at 6am with my camera.  It makes you appreciate and seek out the details of a place.  It has also allowed me to meet a lot of the local workers and early risers.  Those are usually the only people up this early in the morning.  

Most importantly walking can make you fall in love with a place.  If you walk the same walk daily you will know it like the back of your hand but it is still ever changing.  Noticing these details is something I strive for.  This is why I love Brooklyn so much you are forced to walk and interact with people daily.  It's why I so identify with Brooklyn over Manhattan.  Manhattan is more of a head down run to where you are going kind of place.  Brooklyn is much more of a neighborhood feel.  

This also brings me to identity.  For a long time I felt Connecticut was a big part of my identity.  It is based on my past identity.  It is no longer apart of my future.  I didn't realize how we chose our adult identity.  How you define yourself and what you want to be are conscious decisions.  This is why I identify with Brooklyn so much more than Connecticut.  I walk down the street and I run into 5 people I know and the kicker....there is no small talk.  We only know each other based on our similar interests or work.  So 9 out of 10 times the conversations are great, brief, or a friendly wave.  Image going to the grocery store seeing people you know saying whats up and there is no "how are things" it's fucking amazing.  

To wrap this up what makes a place feel like home to me is community, knowing the place like the back of your hand, being a regular at a restaurant to where they know your order and your identity.  Du you identify with the place?  If not LEAVE. 

Connecticut Photography

Day 219 of 365

Pieces of Connecticut. 
It's easy to overlook the culture we understand as home or the familiar. 
The fastest way to see a new place isn't a spur of the moment plane ticket. 
It's a fresh set of eyes. 

Your life just got 10x better.

Day 218 of 365

Whats keeping you in pain and why are you letting it keep you there? 

"In an attempt to protect ourselves from pain, we perpetuate behaviors that create the very pain we are trying to avoid." -Unknown

Think about this. 
What do you do when your sad, eat, drink, have sex with strangers.
What do you do when your angry? 
Break shit then get more mad that your things are now broken. 
What things are holding you back in your life because they are comfortable, but always seem to cause you pain? 

Do you really need those things or would your life be better with out that extra glass of wine when you've had a rough day, and why is it so hard to put it down?

Photographing Brooklyn

Day 218 of 365

No photos today just now.

In the present. 
The best place to be.  I've noticed that anytime I am too far in the future in my mind I am anxious.  I also heard this in a well known quote.  "If you are in the past your depressed, if you're in the future you're anxious and if your in the present your happy. 
I don't think anything could be more true for me. 
Goals are so important in my life but doing what you can do for those goals right now in the present is most important. 
It's important to feel the emotions of now. 
Feel your feet on the floor, the temperature of the air, the wind in your hair....if you have any. (I don't) 
You get the point. 
Let's be present today. 
Remind ourselves to return to the moment. 
Right now is passing with each word you read. 
Enjoy this moment. 

How to build a community.

Day 217 of 365

Day 217 of 365
I actually have no idea how to build a community.  I am currently trying, by creating a magazine, featuring artists whose work I admire, and organizing events with people that are doing shit in their own unique ways.  Even having a barbecue on Saturday with new people has lead me to meet some amazing creatives.  Choosing the right people is a lot easier to do then it may seem but being cutthroat and getting rid of the shitty ones is hard.  

This is why I decided to featured photos of my friend Pat below. 
He is a prime example to me of a kind yet extremely honest person. 
I tend to gravitate towards honest people because I find at times I have been nice for the sake of being nice instead of being honest. 
This only does a disservice to the people you are essentially fluffing. 

For example, my best friend Maciek and I were in class one day. 
After class, Maciek pulled me aside and said: "Dude wtf is with you today you were so annoying and all I could think to myself was woh will this dude ever shut the f*ck up."  
It stung but it gave me a chance to fix it. 
People that are honest with you and not rude or degrading to you give you the opportunity to fix unwanted or distasteful behavior. 
These people challenge you to bring your best work and be your best self. 
It shows that they care and FAKE FRIENDS will tell you that everything is great everything is perfect when in reality it's shit. 

If there has anything that has benefitted me from the friends I have chosen to be around it is cold hard honesty. 

As I build a community moving forward in my life I will be surrounded by thick-skinned, honest, and willing to bleed at the knuckles for me kind of people.  
The same goes for the way I treat my friends. 

Tough love is the best love. 


Cliff jumping in Connecticut

Day 216 of 365


Pictures By Blackout.jpg

This weekend one of my good friends from NY came to visit us in Ct.  It was an absolute blast. 
We went out for coffee, went cliff jumping went out for tacos, and then out for the night to dance.  It was a wholesome weekend and through out it all I managed to eat clean and it made me realize something. 

Cheat days are bullshit. 

Having a cheat day from a "diet" or from any commitment for that matter implies that what you are attempting to commit to is unenjoyable.  Which is why most people fail with these commitments.  No one wants to do something that sucks. 

Right now in my life I'm trying to think more long term. 
Making decisions that I can potentially commit to forever or for a few years. 
Good decisions compound. 
With each good one it only becomes easier to make more good decisions the opposite is also true. 
Bad decisions lead to more bad decisions. 

Take control of your life by making good small decisions daily. 

Apple over chips. 
20 minutes of exercise over a nap. 
Reading instead of Tv. 
Create instead of consume. 

Chose a lifestyle that doesn't need cheat days.

Live your kind of life.  

How to find your passion.

Day 215 of 365

Wherever the wind takes you is a bad place to go.  It avoids commitment, which is something I have struggled with in my life because I am so turned on by freedom.  The open road, the smell of salt water, the ability to wake up on a Monday and go for a walk rather than rush into work. 
These things make my work undeniably enticing but it's not as romantic as it seems.  It takes tons of deadlines, business savvy, and reaching out to potential clients to make this work.  I wouldn't have it any other way.  This business is hard but life is fucking good.  WHo else can go skate with their friends on their days off and move their work around to fit their schedule. 
If I need to work into the night I do. 
If I want to work in the morning I do. 
It took 5 years to get here and I am nowhere near where I want to be but I'm heading in the right direction. 

I hope you find your direction. 

Living in the present.

DAY 214 of 365

Yesterday is dead. 

I had some amazing talks with my best friend yesterday.  About my aversion to certain changes in my life and about being in the present moment. 
My life was extremely stable growing up thanks to my mother. 
My best friends life was quite the opposite. 
Stable financially yes but his parents divorced early he had to move every few years or so to a knew home. 
He didn't have the option to stay where he wanted it was just you are going here otherwise you can be homeless. 
As kids we feared him moving would split us up but it never did. 
It never made our relationship more difficult. 
It only showed us that change was exciting and that our friendship over 15 years is as solid as ever. 

At this point in my life I am trying to embrace change. 
You can fight it but you will never win. 

The only constant in life is change.  Yesterday is dead, the future isn't here yet all we have is the present. 


Achieve anything.

Day 212 of 365

I haven't been on here in a few days.  No excuses.  It was a choice.  If I wanted to make time for it I would have. 
This is also a problem because I believe in momentum.  
It's like pushing a car in neutral. 
Once you get it moving it's much easier to keep the car rolling if you keep walking but as soon as you stop, well that it's soooo damn hard to get that car rolling again. 
This is a problem I have always had with "cheat days on diets", "Stopping while running", etc. etc. 
When you break from great behavior or new habits you lose your momentum. 

Time to keep it going. 

How to be more Creative.

Day 211 of 365

Creativity is the last great variable to success.  What separates you from other people, animals, and machines, is a unique view of the world.  This comes from questioning. Philosophy broken down in the Greek language means Phylo to love and sophy knowledge.  To love knowledge. 

To learn more we must question and form our own opinions. 
This is one of the most beautiful parts about being human.  When you meet someone who has different opinions on the world then you.  You will rarely remember the person you meet that regurgitates all of your own beliefs unless they make you feel great.  You will always remember the person who opens you up to a new opinion something you have never heard.  

For instance I was staying at a hostel in Chicago right by Wrigley field.  
I got in late but I hit the back deck to have a beer and look at the view of the stadium.  There I met a few older cubs fans and a 19 year old kid from the midwest traveling by himself.  The kid was extremely intelligent and we had some amazing conversations that night in which he had strong opinions but he was very willing to listen.  
The next morning I was leaving. 
I saw that kid at breakfast I went over and said "Hey man it was great meeting you enjoy the rest of your trip."  To which he replied I will never see you again so enjoy the rest of your life I Hope it's everything you want." 

I was so deeply sobered by this response.  So simple yet creative and profound.  Excuse me for a second but it was real as fuck. 
The mortality awareness of this 19 year old was far beyond mine.  
It is a line I have since adopted when traveling if I feel it is appropriate. 
It comes to me sometimes and reminds me that when I'm traveling to live so thoughtfully in the moment. 
To enjoy it for what it is. 

A creative approach to simple things in life can drastically change your mind and your success.  Wether it be the way you wash dishes, the way you say goodbye, or the way you start your day. 
Creativity is the last action that humans can out-best machines in and I think it is important that we make it a point to question the way we do things every day. 

Through questioning we obtain new answers. 

Dealing with a fresh breakup.

Day 210 of 365

You can't fuck your ex away.  It will never work.  The intention is entirely in the wrong place.  In the physical not the emotional.  Your ex. will always be their own person, your actions cannot physically affect them.  You might hope what you had was real.  Was an honest connection in life.  That you shared things no one else may know about you but you can't undo the past.  It's done.  But what you can do is have some freaking fun with your life.  Make mistakes heal in your own way.  Even if that means having promiscuous sex.  Live a little.  It may hurt the other person but your focus should be on you now and whatever makes you happy.  I think the cheap ways like booze and promiscuous sex only make things worse because they're easy.  If you can see past the cheap immediate relief and make long term decisions you will change for the better. Eg. Working out, pursuing creative or career goals, meeting new people everyday.  A sustainable form of happiness will emerge through struggle and smart choices.  When the alcohol dries and the one night stands are gone you'll be left with yourself.  An emotional being deserving and looking for love.  

Skating Stamford Connecticut

Day 209 of 365

Life is good. 
I know I may write seemingly depressing things often but I have nothing to complain about. 
My writing is simply a way of purging whatever my brain is thinking onto paper. 
Its a process of becoming more self aware everyday and to progress you need to seek out things you can improve. 
That may sound self critical but its more liberating if you ask me. 
Having something to improve is exciting. 
It gives you something to work also pushes you to seek out new opportunites. 

So if my writings ever seen depressing, overly self critical, etc.  just know it's my way of bringing awareness to my faults and my strengths.  It's a daily ritual not to be taken too seriously. 
After all I'm just having fun.  

Featured below. 
Mike Eggleton. 

How to get over an ex.

DAY 208 of 365

Don't go backwards....ever. 
Only forwards. 
It's not simple at all. 
It's extremely painful but if you remember and keep in your head the reason you ended things each day becomes better and better.

All of the good things I have in my life have come from putting myself through pain or discomfort. 

Do not romanticize the good times or your ex's good characteristics you wouldn't be broken up if you were still right for each other.  You or they wouldn't have made this decision to split if this person was right for you.  If they're only perfect sometimes they are not the one for you. 
On to the next note. 
Never go back. 
It's messy. 
The change you want, you will never see because no one will ever change for you, they will only change for themselves. 

How to be more confident.

DAY 207 of 365

Confidence comes from here. 


Not from here.


This one is extremely simple but it is something near to my heart.  It pains me to see people lose their confidence or never have any to begin with.  I grew up extremely confident, borderline arrogant and as time goes down life can beat you down.  You can date someone who is mentally abusive, you can have a streak of failures, fuck you can even lose your looks.  

Shit happens through out life that can wear our confidence down.  Yet confidence is still one of the most appealing things when it comes to attraction.  Confidence as you get older is a conscious choice.  Once you flip the switch to IDGAF what people think about me, the world becomes your oyster.  

This leads me to my next point I dated someone for many years who has little self confidence.  It was really hard for me to understand or even tolerate but I tried to be patient.  How could someone be so pretty and lack so much confidence.  How could someone second guess every step they make.  I fell into this trap hard before and lacking confidence was a terrible feeling and I had to claw my way out.  The above diagram says it best but I will spell it out for you.  Confidence does not come from the external it comes from within.  You can have the best car, the nicest clothes, hottest significant other it doesn't matter.  If you aren't Rick Ross in your own head no amount of materials or exercise will change your confidence.  

How I took action on this.

STOP being indecisive.  Make small decisions quickly and stick with them.  Ex. order your food within 2 minutes of seeing a menu, and then stick with your choice. 

Be foolish.  Say whatever comes to your head.  If it gets you in trouble you'll be sure not to say that shit again.  But you will have at least said something. 
A closed mouth doesn't get fed. 

Talk to random people often.  Old ladies in the super market, girls your age at the book store, bank tellers, your crush, people on the internet etc. 

Other than that share.  DOn't give a fuck what people think.  There opinions literally mean nothing and have no affect on your life. 


Do you need to travel to take great photos?

Day 206 of 365.

Yesterday I was shooting with a model friend and she said I love this look it would be so much better on a beach.  At first, I thought to myself, yeah, yeah it would.  Then I thought to myself bullshit everyone shoots this on the beach.  What separates you from the next person is a unique perspective on life and how you create from that perspective.  

I was born in the suburbs and my curiosity about what was around me has given me a unique perspective on what is possible here.  You are only limited by your beliefs of what you can and can't do. Ex. 50 years ago if you were born a male most people would assume they had to stay a male for the rest of their life.  These days we are starting to view our identity as a choice and not just by our physical appearance.  Yeah, I don't think we can ignore our reality but by acknowledging it and choosing to change our opinion of it we can make really great things happen.  

I know people who spend enormous amounts of money chasing amazing landscapes and locations to photograph.  Don't get me wrong I love to travel just as much as the next guy but I think for most photographers it can easily become a crutch.  I tell myself that I don't need people, landscapes, a good camera, etc to take good photos all I need is good light and I often shoot the light around my town.  When your traveling shooting awe-inspiring landscapes you are competing with the 10,000 other photographers who have taken those photos too.  The only thing separating your photo from theirs is the time of day and your editing.  When your shooting in your personal space, your town, neighborhood etc.  It is so unique to you.  You are the one and only person shooting there.  You know the area like the back of your hand.  Combine that with real people or the people you love and create memories in those places and your photos will explode.  Those are the photos that most go crazy for.  Portraits of real people interacting loving embracing, etc.  

I know all photography and art is subjective but if you are stuck in the suburbs for a week shoot in the suburbs.  If you're stuck in your hotel in Alaska shoot in the pool.  Don't limit yourself with I need XYZ to take photos.  You don't and the moment you let go of that notion is the moment you start creating more meaningful work. 

Sunset Photography in Rhode Island.

Day 205 of 365


Some of the best days of my life have been spent on this back porch. 
Listening to bag pipes and watching the sunset.  
I don't need much just my family and a view. 
That's the kind of worry free I'll strive for. 
Doesn't mean I don't want millions of dollars.  
Doesn't mean I do. 
I'll make what it takes to have the lifestyle I desire. 
Enjoying the pain along the way.