Day 210 of 365

You can't fuck your ex away. It will never work. The intention is entirely in the wrong place. In the physical not the emotional. Your ex. will always be their own person, your actions cannot physically affect them. You might hope what you had was real. Was an honest connection in life. That you shared things no one else may know about you but you can't undo the past. It's done. But what you can do is have some freaking fun with your life. Make mistakes heal in your own way. Even if that means having promiscuous sex. Live a little. It may hurt the other person but your focus should be on you now and whatever makes you happy. I think the cheap ways like booze and promiscuous sex only make things worse because they're easy. If you can see past the cheap immediate relief and make long term decisions you will change for the better. Eg. Working out, pursuing creative or career goals, meeting new people everyday. A sustainable form of happiness will emerge through struggle and smart choices. When the alcohol dries and the one night stands are gone you'll be left with yourself. An emotional being deserving and looking for love.